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this is my evolution in dance

 BAH

I gotchu.

Me? Dancing?? Unheard of.

So forget about the dance bit and let's focus on evolution. What is evolution? Maybe for the Christian moms in the audience that's a bit of a hot button topic with the whole "wE caN't be aPes" debate, but I digress. To me, evolution is simply the growing and transformation of one thing to something else that is different than what it was before.

I hesitate to say that the new thing is 'better than' or 'more impressive than' because truly, what constitutes something being 'better'? There are obvious things we can point to, like how our ancestors and other animals have had to evolve to their surroundings and biologically develop characteristics that will lead to their survival. However, if we're talking about evolution with no respect to biology or anything like that, than what is 'better?' 

People are constantly changing. All the time. Maybe our opinions don't change quickly, or ever (I'm lookin' at you, Karens) but there are things about ourselves that we change frequently. Our personal style, love lives, whatever! While I do think humans are creatures of habit, I think various things about ourselves change frequently based on our recent interactions with the world and the individuals around us. Some days I'm in love with life, and other days, I want to abandon everything and hide in the French countryside, never to be seen again. We're changing, inconstant, irrational creatures. 

Things about ourselves change on the daily, and then there's evolution. Evolution is slow going, taking years to happen. Biologically speaking, it takes generations for a biological anomaly to become the 'norm' and to become an advantage for a species. Think about it: Who are you now? What worries you? What do you care about? What are your least favorite things? What would you do for love? Now stop, and think of yourself 5 years ago. 

Maybe for some of us, the person we were 5 years ago is not so different from who we are now. But personally, I was a completely different person 5 years ago. I was stuck in a religion I didn't want to be a part of, I was miserable in the closet, I was just beginning to find my love of theatre, my only worries were about upsetting people, etc. etc. etc. Now, I am out of the closet, I'm no longer part of a religion that is *problematic*, my worries have tripled exponentially, I just realized I have horrible taste in men, I live, love, and breathe theatre, etc. etc. etc.

Maybe the differences aren't all that big, but they feel big. I feel incredibly different from that boy 5 years ago. Some things are 'better' for me now than 5 years ago, and others aren't. But I'm different. I've grown. I'm growing and understanding how to love people 8 different ways, how to navigate being a young, queer adult in a very heteronormative, Christian community, all that fun jazz! But my point is this.

Things change over the course of our lifetime. There's no accounting for what that may be or how we'll react. Just know that you will react. Somehow. And whatever you do and whatever you go through will affect you in some way. I suppose the hope is that, someday down the line, we can look at ourselves in the mirror and think, "I'm 700 new things built on 700 old things. Thank god." 

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