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i'm so glad we had this time together


         Here we are at the end of the semester. Freshman year, take 2 is over! And what an amazing whirlwind of a year. I've grown so much as a performer. I still have SO much to work on, but I've made decent progress this year I think haha. But the best thing is that now when I'm struggling with stuff or having a block, I now have tools that will help me figure out and fix things. Which I haven't had before! Before, if something wasn't working, I didn't know how to fix it, but now I have tools that can help me figure the things out! It's awesome :)

    My understanding of my body and how I can use it has dramatically changed this semester. Before this class, I never used, or actively thought of using, my body before. I'm definitely a mental and mouth actor. Meaning, a lot of my acting is very cerebral and stays very much in my head with a lot of my emoting coming from my mouth. I haven't fully inhabited my body before and told a story specifically and only through my body movements. 

    I won't pretend to know that I know how to use my body completely now and can tell a story perfectly and beautifully because that is absolutely not true, BUT. I'm so much more aware of my capabilities as a storyteller through movement. This is something I definitely want to keep exploring because the concept of having a hand gesture or look of the eye mean so much is very new to me and I want to get better at it. I'm very much so considering taking some more movement or gymnastic classes in upcoming semesters. I want to keep this kinesthetic awareness of my body and try and apply movements and energy to my acting work. Not all characters walk or act the same, so I want to play around and finesse with different movements that can be applied to different characters. Where do their energies sit in their bodies? Etc. Etc.

    And I think being as short and small as I am, being able to explore movements that can convey something larger or more confident than what I normally am could be interesting and beneficial. Not only to characters I play, but to myself as a person. Idk if that makes sense, but oh well!

    Comparing what I can do now to what I knew how to do or could do at the beginning of the semester is crazy. I had never done tumbling before, and now here I am doing handstands and dive rolls and the like! I have never done any solo movement pieces ever in my life, and now I've done 3! I've never done clownwork before, and now I have a fully fleshed out 1940's mobster clown by the name of Nickie 'Snaps' Cardino. I've improved a lot and I've explored a lot of things I had never thought I was capable of. I'm really proud of myself. Sure, I may be hard on myself from time to time, but that's just cause I want to be good at it, and do it well. I want to do this art form justice. But yeah, I'm proud of the progress I've made and I can't wait to continue this work!

    Just a few things to remind myself of moving forward into summer and future semesters.

  • Trust your body. Even if you can't see it or know what you're doing, trust that yourself.
  • Slow down. You may not feel like you're going fast, and you may not intentionally be going fast, but you are being a speedy boi™. Slow down and breathe.
  • When creating characters, think of where they carry their energy. In their hips? Their shoulders? How does their perspective on the world and their place in the world affect how they move or walk? Do they expect people to come to them? Or do they go to the other people?
  • Remember opposites. One way might be the right way, but explore the opposite of that. You can learn and gain new things from exploring opposites. 
  • Look into classes that teach more movement things and grow from there!
  • Lead with grace and with confidence. No more Mr. Not Wanting To Take Up Space. You deserve to be there. Enjoy yourself and the work.    

  So yeah! Thank you for an awesome semester, Jason! You've been so helpful and encouraging and wonderful and I'm really grateful to you and this class! I'm excited for future classes and I'm looking forward to the new school year. And to leave off in the words of Carol Burnett:

    "I'm so glad we had this time together

    Just to have a laugh or sing a song

    Seems we just get started

    And before you know it

    Comes the time we have to say

    So long."

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